Sometimes I have little moments of sadness. I start thinking about how I want my life to be different, how I want to be doing different things than I am now. I start feeling rather ungrateful and even say some things that I promise I don't mean.
Last night was like that for me. Mostly, the sadness revolves around wanting so, so much to have a little cryings (code word for baby in Sam&Chas land). I was feeling unrealistically hopeless about things changing. ever. Do you ever feel that way? Like your life is just stuck in a static rut?
But that's just the thing. In reality, my life isn't stuck or hopeless or sad at all.
There are things I wish were different, sure. There are things I want desperately, yup. But hopeless and awful? Get real.
I need to remind myself that I can hope for things I don't have right now, and be totally happy with my present life all at the same time.
I was sitting, at 11pm, slouched on our couch underneath my little black rain cloud, when Chas suggested we go for a quick walk around the block.
"Come on, babe. I'm forcing you to go. You just need to get up and out of the house for a bit."
It. was. just. what. I. needed.
The sky was dark, we were bundled up warm, the green, green grass smelled of rain, and the street lamps lit up the popcorn popping on the apricot trees ever so gloriously.
We ended up walking farther than just around the block and even kept going when it started raining.
I guess sometimes little black rain clouds aren't so bad after all.